He knows nothing of himself other than he is unhappy. He does not even know where he was born. He spends his days wandering the castle until he happens upon a stone portal with alien carvings. He goes though and makes this way up a ghastly and terrible stair case ending in a trap door. And even though he climbed darkness loomed.
What drives this character to keep going into the unknown is mystery. He has seen signs, warnings that what is coming will destroy any remaining sanity he has left. Yet, he trudges on through the darkness and into a room filled with some abject horror. He even reaches out to touch one of it gruesome paws before he turns and runs for his life.
The Outsider is for those of us who have dreamed that those who raised us are mysterious and incompressible. When we finally forced to face our parents, truly understand who they are and what they are about, we are faced with a shockingly realization that we may never understand them. We can only see monsters and wonder how they came to care so deeply for us. This new horrifying knowledge can either undo us as it has The Outsider’s narrator, or we can face it head on.
References to: Hadoth by the Nile, the catacombs of Nephren-Ka, tombs of Neb, feasts of Nitokris
Read it here: The OutsiderLovecraft, H. P., “The Outsider.” The Best of H.P. Lovecraft: Bloodcurdling Tales of Horror and the Macabre. New York: Del Rey, 1982. p. 37 - 41