Here is a short story that I wrote this weekend for my character background in a D&D game that I’m in. I’m playing a 10th-Level Dragon Wrought Kobold Sorcerer who is 90 years old with the aspect of a Chaos Dragon.
Yeah, I know, I’m a big dork, but I love it.
Our GM’s assignment was to write a story based in our character’s childhood. Here is what I wrote, enjoy!
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“Turning Sixty”
Keeping anything as logical and organized as a journal seems quite beyond my abilities. Clang suggested that as the second oldest member of the brood, and any living member of my race for that matter, a record of my thoughts and experiences would be prudent. Seeing that I will be turning sixty at the end of the week, and seeing that no one seems to know what to do with me, I guess that recounting some of my adventures could help pass the time and keep me out of trouble. Trouble! O! Trouble! I used to love trouble, she was a tender and at times brutal mistress, but my days of courting her affections are over.
I guess that I should begin this treatise with some random facts about who, and what I think that I am. Ugh! Writing down that last thought makes me sound all pompous and important. I’m not either of those things. I’m just lucky, praise the swirling chaos that gives and takes. Okay, so here goes:
I like colored greens and vegetables. When I say I like colored greens and vegetables, I mean just that. I like red beets, orange carrots, green and yellow peppers, but I like rainbow chard the best. See, all chard starts out as little black seeds, but as it sprouts it unfolds like a well cast ‘color spray,’ something that I just can’t seem to do. Here, I’ll include a quick illustration of what I’m talking about:

O! I almost forgot. I wanted to include that I also really like, O! I’m starting to make myself hungry just thinking about them. I really love a good fire-roasted green tomato! Ha! Tomato!
Clang said that I needed to include some personal information. I don’t really see that point, it is my journal after all, but I’ll trust Clang’s judgment. If anyone would know, he would. He always has everything in order. You should see his horde! Everything in neat piles and tucked away. There is nothing on the floor. When I visit, I always make sure to move at least one thing, but when I visit next, it has always found its ways back to where it belonged. O! The unnecessary worry Clang puts himself through.
59 for 2 more days. Got my wings when I turned 21. Willie Haydukeson. Love the little ones. Never left the mountains; I mean, why would I? 689 or 10 Long Fire Curve.
There, Clang, I did it, but I did it my way. So, you can just go blow smoke out your ass.
Yellow apples! Chaos! I love yellow apples! O! and blue berries, I don’t know what they are called, but the berries that are blue are the best berries. I think that I might have to glide over to the Feck’s vines and get me some of them blue ones.
You know, writing all this down is starting to feel good. Writing gets me to thinking about turning sixty this week, and thinking about turning sixty makes thinking about when I turned ten, almost fifty years back now:
When I was ten, I had just discovered trouble for the first time. O! I’d been in trouble before, but when I turned ten, I went out on a mission to cause me some big trouble. What I discovered was that I had a talent for trouble, or I guess you could say that trouble loved loving me.
There had been some rumors a group of Rock Giants had taken up residency at the base our mountain. I’d seen giants before, some were friendly with the fire dragons that have a brood near by, but I’d never seen a Rock Giant before and that seemed strange to me. So, in my wisdom, I decided to pay them a visit.
I went alone, just me, ignoring Kobold rule #1 (I’m not much for rules), which states that when traveling, travel in parties of at least six or more.
When I got to their camp, I saw that it was much more than just a camp. They had molded the living rock into fabulous granite alehouses and homes. They had also tilled up the valley and started a very industrious looking system of agriculture. I had to see more.
I walked directly into what looked like the center of town. I climbed up the largest water fountain that I’d ever seen. I stood at the top and looked out over the town, not a town really, but a city to rival that of the dwarves. It all seemed completely impossible too me. I’d only just heard of their arrival a few days ago. The thought ran though my head, ‘They must have some truly powerful magic.”
Even though I was in the middle of town, I’d yet to see any of these Rock Giants. So, I cast a few spells that I new, making lights that danced, opening and closing doors, making things float and crash.
Then the Rock Giants seemed to come from every direction. They looked just like the giants that I’d seen visiting the fire dragons, except that their skin was a little dry and a peculiar shade of grey. Some seemed angry, while others were obviously angry, but they could not find the source of the commotion.
Then a small one, a child probably, spotted me at the top of the fountain waving my hands to keep the lights dancing. Leave it to the imagination of child to look up while the adults are looking around at their feet. I stopped concentrating on the lights and leaped from the fountain top, I’d always been a good jumper, on to the roof of the closest house. Then I ran!
A few days passed before a messenger arrived in our village with a small box addressed to: “The Brightly Marked Lizard.” Being that I was the only Kobold to meet that description, the brood elders summoned me to collect and open the package in front of them.
When I opened the package, there lay a large gold piece and a note. I picked up the gold piece. It was heavy and felt good in my hand.
The elders urged me to read the note aloud. It read:
Dear Friend,
Thank you for your light show earlier this week. At first, you gave many of the women and children a harsh starling, but then when we found you at the source, we had ourselves a good chuckle.
To pay for your services, please accept this gold piece. If you ever find yourself facing a decision, flip it. The coin will always put you on the virtuous path.
May you live until you are older than the eldest of your race by 30 years.
Sincerely,
Grup The HardenerAs you can imagine, the elders had many questions for me after that.
Wow! Look at the shadow entering my cave. Now, I’m really hungry for some blue, or what ever those things are called. I wonder if going there now is a good idea!
*Flip*
O! It is. It is.